You Can Open Your Eyes, Now: Writing Those Difficult Scenes Outside Your Comfort Zone

Too scared to write that scene?

When I joined my first critique group, I was definitely nervous about having my work read For. The. First. Time. Ever. by anyone outside my family. I had written scenes that were not only uncomfortable for me to write, but ones that made me squirm in my seat thinking that other writers were reading them. What if those scenes made them laugh, when in all actuality they were supposed to be serious? What if I sat down to a table full of weird looks? Or even worse, what if they flat out told me I didn't know what I was doing?

Well, to my utter relief, one of the very first comments I received concerning my writing was that I really knew what I was doing when it came to writing violence. What? Me? How did that happen? Surprisingly enough, quite easily.


I've written a mixture of interesting scenes over the course of my writing. Some of it is quite obvious that it took some courage to soldier on through the tough parts, but others not as much. I'll give you a short list of the harder ones I've written (perhaps you're struggling with a similar one):

• Violations against women -- This includes anything from rape to spousal abuse and everything else in between. This one is tough, considering I've never been through anything quite this difficult myself, so how could I possibly know what to put on the page? As a woman, I believe, in the very core of who we are, these are some of our deepest fears. Just the thought alone of being abused or raped sends a chill down my spine. If you're looking for a visual, then the film The Accused, starring Jodi Foster, contains a very vivid and heartbreaking scene about a woman being raped. (Caution: This is not for the faint of heart!) Or perhaps more recently with Private Practice's portrayal of the rape of Dr. Charlotte King. I think a good visual helps the writer break down what needs to happen in the scene (and often times see how the victim deals with it), even if it might be hard to watch. If you're going to write it, then you need to make it believable.
• Race-related violence -- A theme that tends to thread through my novels is violence related, in some part, to race. Since my first novel takes place during slavery, I did intense research concerning slaves and plantation life, particularly whippings/beatings and with what sorts of devices (a very dark road of research to travel, my friends). My second novel deals with the 1920s KKK, so again, I did intense research concerning how the Klan tormented/tortured their victims. Depending on what part of the country they were located, the KKK targeted all different types of races, foreigners, religions, etc. Many people don't realize how active the Klan was throughout the lower forty-eight, but interestingly enough, one of the strongest divisions was the Indiana Klan. A good film for this category would be Rosewood. Very tragic and horrific what went on there. (Caution: Again, not for the faint of heart!)
• Murder -- Again, something with which I have no experience. These scenes get tough to write and I always do a step-by-step visualization (kind of a murder Paint-by-Numbers). When finished writing one, always ask yourself -- "Does it seem believable?", "Does it make sense to the reader?", "Is everyone where they need to be in the scene?" and "Does it flow well?" If if feels herky-jerky, like you glossed parts of it over or just mish-mashed it together, then take a step back and go through the scene in your mind. For a visual, I would suggest just about any movie or tv show that allows the viewer to see how the crime was played out. The Changeling, starring Angelina Jolie, reveals the children's murders through how the young accomplice viewed them.
• Sex/Love Scenes -- The bane of any non-Romance writer's existence! These, for me anyway, tend to be the toughest of all. I always want some amount of romance, but making it feel real can often times make it feel cheesy to the reader. Unless you're writing a Romance novel, try to avoid as much flowery vocabulary as possible. One thing I try to avoid until it absolutely has to be written into the story is, "I love you". It's so clichéd sounding when it gets used repeatedly in a novel. Every scene is different because every two sets of characters are different. Two teenagers are not going to experience their love the same way as a hardened cop and her murder suspect would. Search out visual representations of your characters together and watch how the actors' scene plays out. Then go from there.

One thing I don't touch upon here (except in making reference to The Changeling) is horrific crimes involving children. I've never had a reason to write one, and quite honestly, I believe that's where I'd draw the line. Although I haven't read it, I've heard that Alice Sebold's, The Lovely Bones, involves rather descriptive scenes of her main protagonist. I haven't been able to bring myself to read it but, well, there you go.

I'm a lot like many of you when it comes to writing my characters into incredibly difficult scenes. I want to do it with one eye closed. In truth, I know I have to face it head-on if this is what I need to put my characters through. Just keep in mind that you can do it and when you've accomplished it, it will be that much easier to write the next one.

Hang in there and you'll
make it through!

How about you? How do you deal with writing those difficult scenes? Is there a process you go through to make it believable and work really well on the page? Or do you avoid them, perhaps gloss them over? Or maybe you just don't write that kind of fiction to begin with?


♥ Mary Mary

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Everyone have a great Thanksgiving! Treat yourself to some holiday cheer and laughter and go watch Planes, Trains and Automobiles, the best Thanksgiving movie ever!